An homage to female friendships

A professor once told me there was nothing more powerful [beautiful, foundational, insert superlative] than male comradery.

He was a political theorist, steeped in ancient societies which elevated men above others, especially when it came to education and thought. Male spaces, male advancements, from which all others were systematically excluded.

But he couldn’t have known such reverence had been preempted by my high school teacher. She had turned off all the lights one day, had us stare up into shadows on the speckled plaster tiles, and explained that male-dominated institutions were born out of the inherent fear of women that men carried. Fear and jealousy.

And while I don’t hold credentials in gender studies, I would like to offer that in my life, there have been few things more foundational [beautiful, powerful] than female friendships.

The group chat, now the length of an epic, ranging from the most acute confessions to banana peel ducks.

The woman I’ve known since kindergarten, with significant gaps in speaking and seeing each other, who told a story at my stepfather’s funeral service that brought the most stunning comfort and relief through laughter.

The friend who sees a version of me that I’m not sure really exists. But she still fights for me, fights me, to see it.

My milestone friends, who just happen to be right beside me through every adult experience. To share, to advise, to listen, to support.

Or the one who is exactly like me in just about every way, saving me from having to explain. She just knows.

The one who sent me, and now my daughter, a postcard of every single place she visits. Who never fails to show up just when I need her.

The friend who doesn’t hesitate to give all she has, and would try to give even more if I’d let her.

And how so many of them encompass multiple of these. Because they care and because, I hope, they find that same amount of peace in the friendship as I do.

In a society which still spurs female competition and perpetuates the fallacy that women only can occupy a scarce number of spaces, we deserve to celebrate every time we spring ourselves from those traps. To instead find support and loyalty on the path onward.